Monday, September 7, 2009

Relationships with Thai ladies

I am sure this will be a topic familiar to a lot of people who read this blog.....

And there are no doubts that some of you reading this are crying into your Beer Chang because your sexy, treacle-coloured love bunny, who only last week was professing undying love to you, has just run off with a guy who is richer, more handsome and has a bigger house than you!!!

But to all those guys (or gals!) who are considering a relationship with a Thai, I urge you to go ahead and try what the exotic East has to offer (but please ignore the last paragraph, I don't want you to think it will necessarily end in disaster!!!) .

Despite all the challenges, including, the Mariah Carey-esque diva tantrums, the language problems and miscommunications, the financial strains and the bug-eating (if your squeeze happens to be from Isaan!!!), a relationship with a Thai can be extremely rewarding.

As I have alluded in previous posts, Thai people that you meet when going about your day-to-day business will usually be polite, helpful, warm-hearted and generous to a fault. You will also notice that Thai women are the epitome of grace, elegance, charm and good manners. Unlike in the West, where the majority of women you encounter are strident, mcdonalds scoffing misandrists (I am writing from a male perspective here, so before any of you girls get on your high-horse and start berating me, I also think most men in the West are becoming a parody of Jim Royle....that is to say; obnoxious, lazy, work-shy, binge drinking, n'eer do wells!!! For those of you from outside the UK who don't know Jim Royle, please click on this link http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/theroylefamily/)

Nevertheless, any casual encounter with a Thai lady will no doubt pique your interest and set the tone for you search for Miss Perfect.

You may be wondering who I am and what experience I have had with the "fairer-sex" in Thailand, so I shall give you a bit of background;

I think I'm a fairly typical guy. I'm a 30-something University-educated Englishman, I do a mundane but quite well-paid job for a large business travel company (I won't name names as I have made some derogatory comments about them in previous posts and I don't fancy defending a libel claim!!!). I have have travelled extensively so like to think that I'm understanding and reasonably culturally aware.

You may wonder why I 'm not looking for a relationship in my home country and you might be starting to think that I can't pull because i'm too busy eating out of bins, scrounging for loose change in piss-covered trousers or sniffing lines of Charlie off the bare bottoms of 15 years olds. I would like to state categorically, for the record, that this is not the case!! Other than a penchant for cider and large tubs of pringles, which in recent years has led to a slighlty expanding waist-line, I am a nice-looking, witty and relatively articulate chap.

I first visited Thailand in late-2003, it was one of the first stops on a post graduation "world tour". We started our tour in Singapore which failed to "light my asian fire", mainly because we spent several nights in a flea-ridden squat masquerading as a youth hostel and subsisting on a diet of McDonalds. however, upon arrival in the Big Mango, I was immediately struck not only by the "hustle and bustle" but the fact there were gorgeous ladies as far as the eye could see!!! Although our time in Bangkok was short, having tasted the forbidden fruit on offer in Patpong and Nana Plaza, I vowed to return.....

In all I have returned to the kingdom 12 times since 2003 with the longest stay being a 6 month stint in Hua Hin, in Mid-2006. I'm not what you would call a "Thailand veteran" (but I know lots of mangy, moth eaten specimens who can claim that title!!!) , nevertheless, I certainly know my arse from my elbow when it come to things Thai.

I have been out with my fair share of Thai ladies both of the "Go-Go" and "non-Go-Go" varieities and would like to think I'm well-placed to comment.

When I was living in Hua Hin, like a lot of Western chaps there, I took the easy option of bar-fining girls from beer bars and other entertainment establishments. Whilst the girls were good fun and I had an absolute whale of a time, I knew that if I was going to have a long term relationship ,with a decent chance of success and to prevent myself from turning into a rampant degenerate, then I must get up off my ass and venture slightly further than Soi Bintabaht.
I'm not knocking relationships with former bar girls as I do happen to know several guys who have married ex bar girls and have very good, successful relationships. However, a lot of relationships with former "working girls" are doomed to failure!!!

After my forays into the bar scene, I took to dating, what most Westerners in Thailand would call "good girls". (I don't like this description because after all what is a "good girl"?, I've met both good and bad people from all walks of life and I don't like to be too judgemental). This list of dates included shop workers, office girls and university students.

The biggest problem facing any relationship in Thailand is communication, as the level of English is generally quite low, even with supposedly well-educated university girls!! Some of the girls I dated were who were studying English, had the same command of English of a 10 year old and not suprisingly meaningful conversations were at premium.

Nevertheless, i persevered and managed to find a young lass who ticked all the boxes. She was sweet, good fun and happy-go-lucky. We had a lot in common and her English was good. We were together for about 2 years before it descended into the realms of tragi-comic farce and I ended up knocking the relationship on the head.

I think that dating is like learning to ride a bike, when you're in the saddle you feel like you're the "King of the world" but it is only a matter of time before you come a cropper and you end up face-down on the pavement, looking like spectacular tit!!!


After having picked my self up, dusted myself down and applied a large dose of savlon to the grazed knees of life, I felt it was time to get back in the saddle and try to re-start my love life.

But that is for the next blog.........

Over and out

Penfold

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