Thailand: Deadliest destination for Aussie tourists......
In 2008-09, a total of 1038 Australians died whilst on holiday overseas and Thailand which received 378,000 Australian visitors accounted for 105 of those deaths!!!! It is lucky that England won the Ashes or that death toll would have been a lot higher!!!!
So statistically, your average Aussie has got more chance of winning a test match, by bowling underarm, and wearing a tutu and flip-flops, as they have of staying alive in Thailand!!!
It doesn't bode well for Dame Edna or Skippy, so you'd best lay off the sang som and coke guys and watch ur back!!!
If you would like to read the the full report please click on the link below......
Why is it that so many Australians end up croaking in the Kingdom? Are they complete clowns who couldn't find their arse with both hands or are they just plain unlucky?
I'm sure most of us in the Northern Hemisphere will agree that it's the former, so, to give my Aussie friends a helping hand, I have come up with a simple equation that should help reduce the number of deaths:
10 Beers + large spliff = impaired mental faculties (x journey on poorly maintained motorbike (- crash helmet) + pot-holed roads = limited life span.
You may think I'm being unecessarily harsh on my Antipodean friends by labelling them as drunken, bumbling, knuckle-heads. But they're just one step up the evolution ladder from the Kiwis, who themselves are just below the Neanderthal!!! (I hope my soon-to-be, Kiwi brother in law doesn't read this post!!!!)
But it is hard to argue against my theory when Australia's only contribution to the betterment of the English langauge is Alf Stewart's classic ..... "you flaming gallah".
And you have to shake your head in bewilderment when you hear quotes like these from former Australian cabinet minister Keppel Enderbery - "Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas".
Taxi for Enderbery!!!!
Before my British readers rest on their laurels and smugly proclaim any sense of superiority, we are also guilty of recklessness and downright stupdity which resulted in 269 of my fellow countryman being killed in Thailand in 2008.
But when you see some of the numpty's arriving from the UK you wonder how they even made it to the airport, let alone manage to get all the way to Thailand.....
So my advice to any would be Travellers to Thailand, is to keep your wits about you, don't put yourself into any compromising positions and do your reserach before you travel.......and last but not least, make sure you have travel insurance!!! The number of people who travel aborad without any kind of protection astounds me!!!!
Talking of protection....if you are going to avail yourself of the services of a nubile young go-go danceer or two, then make sure you're stocked up with party hats, as you don't want to take a case of "Bangkok todger" home with you.
Until next time...